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120.       catwoman
6888 posts
 27 Nov 2008 Thu 11:31 pm

 

Quoting Trudy

 That´s an oldie, I read it when I was 19! From 1981, don´t you think things have changed in more than 25 years?

 

yes, it´s an old book and sadly there are no new prints of it! but I was actually thinking the same thing -- ´did things change since she wrote this book´, and I must say NO. I think what she said in the book is still important to teach today. I think that massive numbers of women, most women that I know still are looking for a man to make them happy, make pursuit for a man the main theme of their lives and if they don´t have one, they don´t feel whole. I myself was raised on ´cinderella type of stories´ too, all walt disney movies feed little girls with messages that they need to be saved by a man, that that´s the ultimate happiness... this has not changed at all, and so this book´s message is not any less important then it was 25 years ago. I am in fact disappointed that women are not talking about their ´cinderella complexes´, that they don´t seem to notice it... that there´s not more dialogue and effort to un-learn it...

121.       Trudy
4772 posts
 28 Nov 2008 Fri 03:58 am

 

Quoting vineyards

Trudy, we can calculate your age easily. Such a faux pas

 

 It was never a secret, Vineyards, in April I´ll be 46.

122.       Trudy
4772 posts
 28 Nov 2008 Fri 04:05 am

 

Quoting catwoman

yes, it´s an old book and sadly there are no new prints of it! but I was actually thinking the same thing -- ´did things change since she wrote this book´, and I must say NO. I think what she said in the book is still important to teach today. I think that massive numbers of women, most women that I know still are looking for a man to make them happy, make pursuit for a man the main theme of their lives and if they don´t have one, they don´t feel whole. I myself was raised on ´cinderella type of stories´ too, all walt disney movies feed little girls with messages that they need to be saved by a man, that that´s the ultimate happiness... this has not changed at all, and so this book´s message is not any less important then it was 25 years ago. I am in fact disappointed that women are not talking about their ´cinderella complexes´, that they don´t seem to notice it... that there´s not more dialogue and effort to un-learn it...

 

Don´t agree. Women I know are much more independent than 25 years ago. Maybe the country you are from/live in determines the type of independency? A man? Yes, nice but not as the ultimate goal of life. Women want to study, a career, and only after that they think about a man and/or children (not necessarily together, not here). I know many women with a good life, career, own house, and they choose for a relationship that gives them something instead of being ´servants´ in the relationship to their men. Also women who don´t want to marry, who say: My life is fine, I have everything I need and for the physical part of life I´ll choose short-term relations (not just one night stands!!) or what we call here a LAT-relationship (Living Apart Together, both your own house). Selfish? Probably, but not more than men who think a women is ´just´ a wife, good for clesning, cooking and sex. And there are still plenty of those men.

123.       vineyards
976 posts
 28 Nov 2008 Fri 05:47 am

 

Quoting Trudy

 It was never a secret, Vineyards, in April I´ll be 46.

 

I will turn 42 on December 22nd.

Two of my favourite writers -especially at this time of the year- are Coelho and Pamuk. I think these two have already created a style of their own telling stories developing around similar themes which they present with different authentic flavours.

 

I grew up reading  Dostoyevsky, Lermentov, Turgenyev and Aytmatov who are the European representatives of now extinct Eurepean literature. There used to be prominent writers like the Polish Henry Sienkiewicz, Czech Vaclav Havel. When we move  further West we need to travel back in time more to find a reputable writer. In America Steinback and Hemingway are relatively close to present day, in France, Germany and Italy there are writers but neither their number nor their impact does any justice to the influence their nations have. I may be wrong but the last reputable Dutch writer must be Erasmus who was a Renaissance writer.

124.       Trudy
4772 posts
 28 Nov 2008 Fri 06:23 am

 

Quoting vineyards

I may be wrong but the last reputable Dutch writer must be Erasmus who was a Renaissance writer.

 

Yep. You are wrong. If you take Pamuk as a good writer (Good but I don´t think he´s from the same level as those Russians you mention), then we have quite some good ones too. Writers like J.C. Bloem, Anna Blaman, C. Buddingh´, Andreas Burnier, Remco Campert, Frederik van Eeden, Harry Mulisch, Multatuli (Eduard Douwes Dekker), Gerard Reve and many more are famous. I think most of them have titles that are translated in English.

125.       vineyards
976 posts
 28 Nov 2008 Fri 06:32 am

"Prominent" is the word. Pamuk won the Nobel so let´s give him some credit. I have not heard of the Dutch writers you wrote about. Maybe it is because I read mostly technical books these days as part of my job.

 

As for the Soviet writers on the list. Of course they were good and just like we cannot have another Mohammad Ali we cannot have writers like them because we cannot replicate the circumstance that created them.

126.       catwoman
6888 posts
 28 Nov 2008 Fri 12:32 pm

 

Quoting Trudy

Don´t agree. Women I know are much more independent than 25 years ago. Maybe the country you are from/live in determines the type of independency? A man? Yes, nice but not as the ultimate goal of life. Women want to study, a career, and only after that they think about a man and/or children (not necessarily together, not here). I know many women with a good life, career, own house, and they choose for a relationship that gives them something instead of being ´servants´ in the relationship to their men. Also women who don´t want to marry, who say: My life is fine, I have everything I need and for the physical part of life I´ll choose short-term relations (not just one night stands!!) or what we call here a LAT-relationship (Living Apart Together, both your own house). Selfish? Probably, but not more than men who think a women is ´just´ a wife, good for clesning, cooking and sex. And there are still plenty of those men.

 

I´m glad if that´s the situation in Netherlands. And... of course what I think reflects where I live.

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